| hmmm... so what an eventful couple of days... NOT!!! ... yah so i started school n its all good n shit like that.. but i dont feel at place.. i feel a little slow haha.. erryone in there is like 24 and up.. n here i am a lonely 17 year old in the big kids world.. haha so anyways yah its been aight .. i find it very insightful and all that BS.. but i still dont know what i wanna do so then anyways... yah me n my BOY have been cool.. we havent talked for a while.. and i feel a lil weird with out him in my life haha.. does that sound a lil corny? yah i know.. i miss him.. i miss him a lot and i want him back right now!! but its like .. hes moving to ATL.. and i really wanna see him again.. n just hear his voice on the other end of that fone.. he made me feel so secure n so alive... he just brought out every inch of good in me and now that i dont see him or talk to him.. i wanna cry n break down!.. i just miss his ass really bad ..haha.. did i fuck up when i turned him down to keep other people from being mad at me??? just answer me that one question!!!!!! |
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| OKAY SO I HAVE A NEW LAYOUT.. THINGS HAVE BEEN CHANGING FOR ME... NEW PEOPLE COMING INTO MY LIFE AND MANY MANY OLD ONES..I JUST KINDA HOPED THAT A CERTAIN PERSON WOULDN'T BE LEAVING ME.. WE'VE KNOWN EACH OTHER FOR A WHILE NOW AND HAVE ALWAYS FELT SOMETHING BETWEEN US, BUT NEVER ACTED ON IT BECAUSE WE WERE AFRAID...AFRAID OF WHAT WOULD HAPPEN. BUT THE PROBLEM IS I DONT WANT TO BE AFRAID ANYMORE. I WANNA RISK EVERYTHING THAT I CAN TO SEE WHAT COULD HAPPEN! WHAT MAKES ME SO AFRAID IS LOSING YOU, AND LOSING YOU REAL SOON. YOU'RE GOING TO LEAVE ME N NOT COME BACK AND IT HURTS TO KNOW THAT. I JUST WISH THAT WE COULD OF TRIED IT, BUT I KNOW THAT IT DOESN'T MATTER NOW SINCE I'VE TOLD YOU THAT I'VE MOVED ON N WE BOTH AGREED TO STAY FRIENDS NO MATTER WHAT. WHAT CAN I SAY.. OTHER THAN YOU WILL ALWAYS HAVE A SPECIAL PLACE IN MY HEART AND I CAN NEVER FORGET ALL THE LAUGHS WE SHARED. YOU WERE THERE FOR ME AND I STAYED WITH YOU THROUGH THE ROUGH TIMES. YOU HELD ME TIGHT WHEN I NEEDED TO BE HELD AND I LET YOU HOLD ME TO SHOW THAT I TRUST YOU. I KNOW YOU'RE READING THIS.. OR AT LEAST YOU WILL SOME DAY READ THIS. I JUST HOPE THAT YOU HAVE A GREAT LIFE AFTER HIGH SCHOOL N ALTHOUGH YOU SAY ITS BEST TO FORGET ABOUT THE PAST... TRY N NOT FORGET THE PEOPLE THAT TRULY CARE ABOUT YOU... ALWAYS AND FOREVER: ~DEE  |
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| shits just gone down the hole.... fuck them... im tired of wondering who lied to me and why... people can't be trusted.. thats fuckin obvious... but i mean come on.. dont make it too damn obvious... hmmm well school is out next FRIDAY.. 17th... starting my new job soon and starting GROSSMONT on the 14th... yep yep.. das right .. imma be a college girl.. haha stuck in the high school world.. that sucks.. but hey imma be up there still.. haha.. xanga isn't as fun as myspace.. i guess im a lil late on that though.. nearly all my friends are never on this thing anymore... but once i start something.. i stick to it.. imma cut it here.. maybe try n fix up this page.. im out |
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| DAMN.. THIS SHIT IS THE BEST PLAY I'VE EVER SEEN IN MY WHOLE LIFE... I CANT BELIEVE THIS SHIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!... ON THE REAL I'VE BEEN PLAYED ... I'VE BEEN PUNKED!!... I NEVER THOUGHT ANYBODY COULD GET ME LIKE THEY DID... IM IN SUCH SCHOCK AND DISBELIEF ... ITS CRAZY HOW MUCH IT HURTS.. I MEAN I KNOW HOW IT FEELS TO BE ON THE OTHER SIDE OF THE FENCE NOW.. I GUESS I THOUGHT I LEARNED MY LESSON WITH THE SHIT THAT HAPPENED BETWEEN ME AND DREA.. BUT I GUESS THIS TEACHES ME OTHER WISE... IM STILL A LITTLE KID TRYING TO LEARN FROM MY MISTAKES...I GUESS I FUCKED MYSELF OVER BIG TIME.. IM SUCH A BLIND-SIGHTED BITCH TO NOT SEE WHAT WAS GOING ON RIGHT IN FRONT OF MY OWN TWO EYES... BUT I GUESS I CANT LET THIS PHASE ME THOUGH... IM NOT CONFRONTIN ANYONE... IM GOING TO SIT HERE AND PRETEND LIKE I DONT KNOW A DAMN THING N GO ON WITH MA LIFE... WHAT A DAY... IM OUT...
AND BY THE WAY... WHAT A WAY TO CELEBRATE A BIRTHDAY... FUCK THOSE BITCHES.. YOU THINK IM BLIND.. WELL LOOK AGAIN DAMMIT....MY EYES ARE OPEN N I CAN SEE YOU FOR THE BACKSTABBING PUNKS THAT YOU ARE... FUCK THE HEART!!!.. THIS HEART CANT STAND SHIT ANYMORE... IM THROUGH |
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| SO A GOOD FRIEND OF MINE GOT IN TO THE SCHOOL OF HIS CHOICE... CONGRATS... HOPE YOU HAVE A GREAT TIME THERE.. ITS GOING TO BE DIFFERENT NOT HAVING YOU LIVING AROUND THE BLOCK FROM ME.. HAHA... BUT FORREAL... CONGRATS ON GETTIN IN.. N MICHELLE .. IF YOU EVER READ THIS.. DONT TRIP HE'LL BE GONE FOR A FEW YEARS... YOU'LL GET OVER IT SOONER OR LATER.. JUST THINK OF IT LIKE IT IS NOW.. YOU GUYS TALK ON THE FONE.. U JUST WONT BE ABLE TO SEE HIM SITTIN IN THE STREET WHEN YOU DRIVE BEEN ON THOSE OCCASIONAL WEEKENDS YOU COME DOWN... I DUNO.. IM TIRED N IM HELLA CONFUSED ABOUT EVERYTHING RIGHT NOW... IF YOU THINK YOU CAN HELP.. GET AT ME SOMETIME...
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